My Mind.

I always had this thought, it's that thought where I believe that the world doesn't exist. Only I do. Don't get it wrong, I'm not being conceited, it's just this thought it my head that keeps telling my mind,

"Once I die, the world dies with me."

There's this thought, in my mind, that tells me that my life is important. It has a meaning and a purpose. It's far greater than anyone else's life. My mind tells me that I matter more than others, that without my life, the world is nothing. But for some reason, even though my mind tells me such things, I was never afraid to sacrifice my life for someone I love and care about. Even though my mind tells me without me, the world is nothing but a dead space, I am not afraid to die.

I start to realize why my mind think of such things. I realize that I do matter, my life is as important as others, maybe to other peoples eyes, my life is just another wasted blessing, but through my eyes, my life is valued and important. But, I finally understand why my mind thinks of such things,

"Once I die, the world dies with me."

it's because once I die, the world stops to exist through my eyes. And another world forms, a world of unknown.

Because the ocean made me realize how small I am in this world. But showed me how important I am.

Good news?

So! I won't be coming back to the United States of America until the 29th of April xD

and and and, I don't know how I'm gonna catch up with all my studies -.- ima be gone for at least 6 weeks? or more?

oh oh oh I've haven't been drinking for the past 4 nights :D

Itlog much?

I never thought I'd miss you this much,
never thought I'd be thinking of you.
Day and night, sunrise to sunset,
Your smiles are just hard to forget.

I don't get to talk to you
I still can't believe its true.
Always feeling blue,
because I'm so far away from you.

Every night I wonder,
as i stare at the stars,
under the mango tree,
it's you i want to see.

I try to connect the stars,
a constellation of where you are,
but only realize,
your so close,
always there where ever I go,
always in my heart.

Because I miss you so much :]
and I don't get to text you and hear your voice :/

Drunk.

One word.

Drunk.

sat down with the fellahs and drank a liter of matador :]

Last night.

Last night was chill!

So I was hungry last night and didnt feel like eating at home so I went to my friends house and ate there instead :D they had some bomb ass filipino food hahaha. So i went over to my friends house (Maki) and ate two full plate of rice and Kare-kare :] got full, said hi to Mommy Dolli and chilled outside where Maki and I just started catching up on the things I missed.

Later on this little kid named Marvic steals a ball from another little kids house named Ivan and started runningwith the ball cuz someone said "RUn marvic RUN!!!" ahem* JoJo... hahaha well the maid came out (Ivan's maid) and started telling me it was my fault marvic started running -.- so I chased marvic and try to get the ball but he ended wanting to have a fight with me for the ball so I just left and told the maid i'll get the ball later :D

Couple minutes later another friend came by, Allen. We started talking and talking and talking just catching up with what I missed in my hometown, then we decided were just gonna drink hahaha Allen left to go eat and Maki and I just went to get he ball. We got the ball and retured it and waited for Allen so we can start drinking :]

Allen comes out and Paulo starts to walk tow ards Maki and I. I told Allen to get water so and I'll get alcohol (Lambanog) and a shot glass :]

We all met up at the table and started the rotation. We started talking about why the group were all separated and that I want to have at least one hangout with everyone in it. And I think tonight were all gonna hangout :D not sure though. But we planned to go to church early on sunday like around 9:30am and probably eat out after that not sure. We kept drinking talk about what guys usually talk about when they drink, BASKETBALL!! :D joke. we just kept catching up with the thigns I missed. so far, I missed a lot. Three years was a long time. We kept drinking trying to finish the little alcohol we had xD it wasnt enough but it was just good enough for a good drunk :] After a while, Mark aka Mako passed by and we made him take a shot hahaha and he said no cuz he had work at 7 in the morning hahaha then he ended up taking more shots xD were soooo bad muahahahaha after that we finished the bottle and just chilled by the mangoe tree, the usually kicking spot. :]

(to be continued)

Kuya.

May God be by your side Kuya Marvin...

"Miss them... but not so much...Learn to let them go."

"Life is the most valuable thing we have. It was given to us for free. Yet we keep on saying things is unfair when things doesnt go our way. But we have to learn in life that everything that begins eventually will end. The word forever doesnt have a meaning. The word Never doesnt exist. Because no matter how much we say we would never do something... eventually we will. Life isnt based on how long we live... but its based on how fun our life has been. How much friends we made. How much memories we cherish. The hardest thing in life is letting go of the ones we love. Letting go doesnt really mean forgetting about them... but meaning that we have to accept the fact that they are gone. And accept that all we have now are the memories we shared with that person. Shed every tear we have, let our eyes turn red and dry. Think back to the memories we shared. The times we had fun. The times we fought. and the times we Laughed our asses off. We cant always hold on to someone forever. We'll have to let that person go and be set free. But we'll always have the memories we shared with that person. They'll always be in our heart no matter where they go. No matter what happens. They have been a part of our life. In the end all we can do is raise our heads high and smile and hope that person is happy where ever they are. And pray to God to take care of them." - JoJo

Because I wrote this a long time ago...

What I was missing...

So.. It's weird. I've never really knew that I miss this place soooo much. I almost forgot what it felt like being here and always smiling and having fun even though life was so hard. I trully missed this place.

Well, let's keep Jellyoo updated. I landed here on Wednesday not sure what the date was xD i dont even know what date it is here all i know its Monday here muahahaha.
well first of all I thank God for answering my prayers and letting me see my old man again and let him see me again :] that was really something i prayed for every night before I sleep. Well i've been spending time in the hospital taking care of my old man and just seeing him smile everytime made me realize how much God has blessed me.

Well lately I've been drinking since I got here -.- its like a non=stop trend here. But its fun cuz i never really drank with my old friends. and its way funnier cuz these people know how to have a good time. hahahaha

I went swimming with my friends and got drunk there again. everytime we got cold we take shots to keep us warm ahahaha such iodiots we are xD but its fun swimming while your drunk and sleepy hahaha theres a chance of you just falling asleep in teh pool and probably drown all cuz of stupidity xD and my friend (not gonna say her name here) fell trying to go down a ledge xD hahaha that was a good night :]

Last night I was drunk again. only cuz i was drinking with two people i havent drank with in a looooong time. I feel like my stomach will get all fat and full of alcohol when i leave this place hahaha
well drinking is not the only thing i do here :] i miss playing basket ball here its really fun.

overall I miss being here just kicking it with everyone having a good time not worrying about any problems at all. It feels like you have no problems bringing i have no problems at all when I'm here xD its an amazing feeling. Eveytime i look at the moon and the stars from here, I know its not the same over there in the states. I know all of this will come to an end eventually that is why im trying my best to live it up here and make it as memorable as possible :]

this place, was the thing i've been missing for so long.


ohhh and I miss Rhio :D

Because Tito Jojo said "Once you live here, you can never forget this place."

Just cause.

There's more to life than just worrying about life itself.